In an alternate universe, I have 5 boyfriends

And I dress them up like quintuplets-same clothes from head to toe!

In an alternate universe, I am everything I've ever dreamt of-

A successful writer, An author, A designer, A songwriter, A director, A mom, A happy and stress-free daughter, A lifestyle YouTuber, and A happy girl in her late twenties.

Someone who doesn’t struggle with perfectionism. Someone who’s diligent and disciplined in whatever she does.

In an alternate universe, I don’t overthink everything.

In an alternate universe, the cookies I bake come out well.

I don’t have to fry every protein to be able to stomach it.

I eat onions.

And boiled eggs don’t taste like shit in my mouth.

In an alternate universe, I tolerate humans. I give them numerous chances to prove themselves, and not throw them off after one mistake because they aren’t perfect enough.

In an alternate universe, I get what I want.

I can stretch my hands into the movies and slap the protagonist for being stupid, or beat up the male lead for being too toxic and hot at the same time.

I can go back in time and sit with the author of a bad book to stop her from publishing or help her proofread before jeopardizing my eyes.

I can walk up to a celebrity on the road and tell them they’re doing okay and that they should live up to their standards rather than the standards the world has placed on them.

In an alternate universe, I’m the CEO of a successful business. And every morning, I drive to work with my Range Rover and walk in like I own the world. The way they do in kdramas.

In an alternate universe, I have 5 boyfriends and they’re all hot and sexy. And I dress them up like quintuplets.

In an alternate universe, I’m married to a multi-millionaire who loves me like the boyfriends in my romance books.

In an alternate universe, I’m a mother to a beautiful daughter. And she looks just like me.

In an alternate universe, I’m everything I want to be because the world is my oyster.

I don’t struggle with anxiety or self-diagnosed ADHD. I don’t fear a lot of things and I live a care-free life.

In an alternate universe, I have it all!

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But this isn’t an alternate universe.

In this universe, things are hard! My cookies don’t bake well. I have to eat fried protein so I don’t throw up. Boiled eggs make me nauseous. I can’t stretch out my hands into the movies to beat up every character that annoys me. And I struggle with self-discipline and consistency.

In this universe, I don’t have 5 boyfriends because I can’t tolerate people, let alone men. I don’t have a daughter because I can’t take care of another human when I’m a mess myself.

The millionaires in my world are old men looking for younger women to prey on while their wives are at home playing diligent wife roles.

In this universe, everything makes me sick but I still want it all.

I want 7 boyfriends, not 5 and I want to be the woman of my dreams.

In this universe, I’m going to have it all!

Maybe not the 7 boyfriends.

But the 5?

Okay, maybe the romantic boyfriend will do, like my book boyfriends—rich and powerful!

Too much?

I don’t know, just give me everything. All of it!