Indulge 3 (On God and Humans)

How twisted is it that we have no idea what we're doing here on earth, even though we think we do...

Sometimes I wish I can have a one on one conversation with God so he can help me understand few things that don’t make sense about life.

On God and Humans

I saw a tweet, saying “tweet to God what you want right now and he’ll answer you,” the first thing that came to my mind was, “I need an answer as to what I’m doinghere on earth, what am I supposed to be doing?” Am I meant to keep hustling day and night, going through every emotional, financial and physical depression every single day, with no direction? Would I get to reap the fruit of my labor or would death come, when it’s time for me to rest and enjoy what I’ve worked for?

Call me crazy but I think about death every day. Especially with the area of education I had in school, it opened my eye to many things that religion may have blinded me away.

Take for instance, when I hit my leg on a wall or get bitten by a scorpion, the first thing that pops up in my head isn’t the pain, but questions, or rather, reality. Did God see this happening? Did he know that I was going to get bitten by a scorpion today? Would this have been averted if I had done something right?

Don’t get it twisted, I love God and I trust him, I also believe in him, but I have questions. Most times, when I feel I’m overstepping my boundaries by questioning God (which is a sin) I try to understand him and see things from his perspective. He created us, we are his children, he sent us to the world so we can love and worship him but we don’t do all that, we’ve deviated from the words of God, we’ve deviated from his commandments and his rules, we’ve created our path that is not under his, we’ve drifted away from him, far away. We all assume we love him but we don’t follow his words, some of us pretend to worship him in truth (the religious fanatics) but we are deceivers and he knows it, he sees it all. We have sinned beyond that of Sodom and Gomorrah. 

That is why I think, he “may” have neglected us. Neglected our cries and requests, we beg him for blessings and promise to follow him if he grants us those blessings, and then when he does, we move away, we don’t stay true to our words. We only run back when things are tough and that is traumatic. We’re all guilty of this, every single one of us (I included).

It’s crazy being a human being, I tell you, no matter how much we question God for all the bad things happening and feel hateful towards him, we are at fault too. Just like how disappointed a parent would feel when neglected by their child after they are grown and successful, it is the same way God “may” feel towards us. 

But then, we are alive and breathing and living. There is no doubt that he still loves us. There is no doubt that he won’t be there for us when we need him. We are his children. 

With that being said, I do not want to be reborn. The world is beautiful. Humans are loving and amazing but I do not want a season 2 of life. Thank you. 

An Extra Thought

This is just an extra thought that doesn’t sit right with me. Before we were created, it is believed that we have been given the right to live freely. The right to live the way we want. But then, we also don’t own our lives, we are responsible for our words and actions, meanwhile all actions and every step we take as humans have already been written down, more like, it has already been pre-recorded so, at the end of the day, we don’t have that freedom. Let me break down a little bit, if you’re a sinner or saint, how you live your life now has already been written down. Your creator knows if you’re going to live a happy life or not, he knows if you’re going to make it to heaven or hell, so that free will we think we have, isn’t free will. 

Specials

I felt it would be nice to create a gospel playlist for y’all. It’s nice to connect with God once in a while.