Why do We Try so Hard?

All this and for what?

It’s Friday morning, and with a cup of tea in my hand, I’ve decided to open my Mac and write to you guys again. (Low-key enjoying this, even though I’m not at my best today.)

Little TMI no one asked for - Cramps have taken control of my body, making it nearly impossible to sit comfortably. This is the one thing that refuses to make sense to me no matter how much it’s explained. It feels like some cosmic punishment for simply existing as a woman.

I won’t get too deep about why womanhood has to go through so many trials and tribulations today because, honestly, that will just piss me off. Instead, I want to talk about something else I think about a lot and that baffles me.

Life. And death.

picture from Pinterest. credits to the artist

Why do we try so hard to live a life we can’t take with us when we leave this world?
Why do we pour so much effort into shaping a future when death is always there, waiting? It’s punctual, never a minute late or early, and always ready to collect.

Life feels messy—absurd, even. It makes no sense to me.

We spend most of our days hustling and struggling for what is to come.

We hustle for a tomorrow we can’t guarantee.

We fall in love, get heartbroken, and do it all over again. Friendships come and go. Careers rise and fall. We build homes, get degrees, lose jobs, battle anxiety, recover from heartbreaks, and sometimes fall apart trying to hold it all together.

All for what? To die?

People say, “Live life to the fullest so you won’t have regrets.” But how do we know any of this will matter when we’re gone? How do we know if we’ll even remember it?

Everyone with their different beliefs, religious teachings, and philosophies tries to make sense of what happens after death. Some say we ascend to heaven if we’ve been a good believer or descend to hell if we’re evil.

Others believe in reincarnation or purgatory.

Then there are those, like me, who wonder if it’s all just… nothingness.

Do people die and go into nothingness? It’s a question I’ve been asking myself a lot recently.

What is waiting for everyone in the afterworld?

No one has the answer to this because truthfully, no one knows. We are just going by what our various religious books have taught us. And what we want/choose to believe.

So why then are we trying so hard? What do we hope to get from this? An applause? A standing ovation? A plate of fried plantain from a gatekeeper saying “Take this, you’ve lived well?” What?

We try way too hard just to survive… just to stay alive… just to say “we have lived” for a life that would give up on us the moment it has had enough.

And that pisses me off so much for no reason.

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picture from Pinterest. credit to the artist.

Still, maybe that’s the beauty of it.

Life isn’t perfect. It’s messy, unpredictable, and sometimes downright unfair.

Yet, in the chaos, there’s room for those tiny, fleeting moments that make the struggle feel worth it—a warm hug, a good meal, laughter with friends, or even a Friday morning with a cup of tea and a thought to share.

Maybe we’re not meant to have all the answers. Maybe it’s enough to just be—to find joy where we can and let that be our defiance against the inevitability of it all.

So, no matter how absurd it might feel, here’s to living. And here’s to fried plantain, because honestly, isn’t that reason enough?

(I’m a plantain hater but still…)

On a more lighter note, Spotify Wrapped came out a few days ago and I’ve never been so underwhelmed ughh. They didn’t even try to put in any effort.

I would’ve done a Wrapped review like I did last year but sorry, I’m currently beefing with Spotify so let’s do this next year, okay?

Listen to Ozeba and Kese this weekend—two tracks that feel like “warm hugs” (not exactly but at least you’ll dance) after a tough year. You’ve earned it.